My family has been through some hard financial times since our beginning. Money can't buy happiness, but many stresses, problems, embarrassments and worries can be solved simply by having enough money and managing it correctly.
I have two girls, J and E. I worry a lot that they get what they need. We have less money than what we use right now, and it's a constant juggling act to make it all work. We survive on less than $300 per month worth of food for a family of four. It would be better if I could do less than $200, so I'm working on that. But so far I've been able to make due with a little under $300. That being said, I like to buy some things for my kids when they ask. Saying, "no" all the time gets old, even for the person saying it. Today, at Target, we were buying cake mix and frosting. (I have yet to find a scratch cake recipe that both doesn't take all day to make and actually tastes good and not floury. Feel free to help me with that if you think you can...) Tomorrow is my husband's birthday, and though I don't have money for a present, we made him a card and I bought him the things to make cake, costing less than $5. Anyway, we are in the baking aisle and my daughter picks out some Jello. She asks so nicely. So I let her pick out 5 packages (totaling a little over $3). It was the highlight of her day to get the Jello and then later, to make it.
It's the simple things. You don't have to have a lot. You don't have to buy your children everything under the sun. In fact, I don't recommend it. Teach them patience and self-control by NOT buying them everything they ever wanted. You'll be doing them a favor and showing them you love them because you want to teach them about life more than you want to buy things for them. A 68¢ packet of Jello made a kindergartener's night tonight and her lunches for the rest of the week.
Another great thing happens when you don't buy everything the kid wants. You can use it for rewards. Or bribery. Whichever works. I have a friend that randomly and without warning comes with a laundry basket and picks up anything that's on the floor. To get it back, the child has to do chores, one for each item. There are a few catches, though. You get clothes back first, and if you don't have any clothes because you left them all over the floor and you have to go to school looking foolish, so be it. I think this is an awesome system. But, you could also use incentives to get extra chores done. If your child does extra chores above and beyond what's expected, they can earn something. I like the idea of giving some kind of reusable currency and giving the wanted item a price. Such as, use marbles in a jar. Each chore has a payment set out. Two for wiping down the sinks and counters in the bathroom, etc. Then, the model plane you want is 20 marbles. Or use magnetic clips to clip dollar bills and a slip of paper describing the chore needed to get the money, and hang on the fridge or create a board that says "Chores for Hire," or something similar. Then the kids can buy their own stuff. Tada! You're teaching your child to work, save, and be patient.
Find ways to enrich your life without adding more stuff. "Human cholesterol, stuck in the system..." You don't need money, fancy travel, the latest toy or album. You don't need a "damn the world" attitude to have fun. Just go. Do. Love. Laugh. Give. Be compassionate. Learn. And keep strong. Nothing lasts forever, the good or the bad. Just keep on keeping on, as they say, and when you look back at your days, the memories will be numerous and you'll know you lived well.
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